Carolyn Mackey

What are some benefits of working with a Post-Relationship Coach?

It will save you time and sanity by helping you: • avoid repeating the same mistakes. • enhance or create your self-care practice. • stay accountable to improvement. • use of practical tools to expedite your healing process. • acquaint yourself with your authentic needs and desires.

What led you to your current profession?

I feel like everything in my life up until I found my passion was preparing me to be in this role today. I’ve had jobs, schools, experiences, and relationships (many of each) that contributed to my unique skill set.

What’s your superpower?

My superpower is my authenticity. I strive to be and share what is good and beautiful and true, while fully aware that I can simultaneously do that and still make mistakes.

What’s your favorite thing about what you do?

My favorite thing about Coaching is the sincere, palpable connection I feel with my clients. It’s the gift that keeps on giving. I live for the feeling of raw, vulnerable, sincere interaction, especially when it leads to transformation. I naturally engage this way which makes me a perfect facilitator of this work, and it innately motivates me to continue developing my service and offerings.

How have your perceptions of life changed as you got older?

Over time I have learned to stop fearing the unknown and learn to enjoy the endless surprises of not knowing. I found that to “not know” is to have access to infinite wisdom beyond my perception.

In the past, what have been your biggest obstacles in business? What helped you overcome those obstacles?
It was and continues to be, self-doubt. This specific form of fear specifically relates to me being not good enough or worthy enough to work as a leader, boss, or decision-maker. I have many self-sabotage techniques and years of experience, so unlearning my unhelpful behaviors while trying to implement helpful new ones is harder than the work itself for me at this stage. What helps me overcome this each time is giving myself permission to do it “badly,” and then improve the next time.

What gets you up in the morning?

These days I get up in the morning excited to take exceptional care of myself. I walk my talk and it makes life wonderful.

What has been your greatest achievement professionally?

So far, my greatest achievement is facing my fear of public speaking. I’ve presented twice now publicly which turned out to be incredibly satisfying. Preparing to speak publicly was a slow process but now I’m looking forward to opportunities to lecture or present publicly.

Do you have any exciting ambitions for the future?

The thing I’m most excited about is the potential to do motivational speaking.

Are there any myths you’d like to bust about your profession?

The biggest myth around coaching is that coaches are irrelevant. On the contrary! Coaching is one of the powerful ways to hold yourself accountable and get guidance that can help you avoid common mistakes. Much like therapy, working with a coach is one way to have support that is 100% committed to you and your success. Unlike therapy, coaching focuses on the practical steps to affect change rather than trying to figure out why that problem exists. Some of the most successful business owners hire multiple coaches to allow themselves to put all their energy into what they do best, while trusting a coach to guide them through areas which they don’t have expertise to save time and resources.

What have you learned about leadership that doesn’t get taught in schools?

Intrinsic motivation can’t be taught in school. School was a great teacher of theory, but when it comes to actual business management and operation, it would be impossible to teach someone what to expect in the real world of self-employment. The thing I find most surprising is that discipline and management of myself is more complicated to master than any business transaction or interaction.

What’s been the best career advice you’ve ever received?

The best advice? It was from my business coach who told me that I should operate my business the way that works and feels good for me. If not, energy is wasted and I will risk giving up because of the unnecessary, self-imposed resistance. Ever since I have trusted this approach, my work has become satisfying and compelling, rather than a continuous, self-inflicted torture.

What’s your favorite success quote?

“Action precedes motivation. You have to ”prime the pump” and get the juice flowing, which motivates you to work on your goals. Getting momentum going is the most difficult part of the job, and often taking the first step is enough to prompt you to make the best of your day.” -Robert J. Mckain

Carolyn Mackey is a post-relationship coach for individuals who are establishing their newest, truest, and most evolved version of themselves after the end of a primary relationship. She can be reached at Up And Over Coaching.