What called you to your line of work?

Life can sometimes take a turn we never expected, leaving us shattered and uncertain of the path ahead. I know this all too well. In a blissful marriage with a beautiful family, I suddenly found myself facing a devastating trauma that rocked my world. In that moment, the future felt daunting, with no degree, no career, and lingering doubts about my self-worth. I knew I couldn't face this journey alone. I needed help.

I reached out to multiple mental health counselors, desperately seeking guidance and support. While some provided limited assistance, it was the voice of one compassionate therapist that stood out. They recognized the profound impact the trauma had on me and introduced me to the transformative power of EMDR treatment. EMDR treatment allowed me to free myself from the chains of self-doubt and realize my inherent worthiness and lovability. I discovered that my past did not define me; rather, it shaped the resilient individual I am today. This pivotal moment ignited within me a burning desire to help others find their own healing and liberation.

Having been on both sides of the therapeutic journey, as both a broken soul seeking solace and a beacon of hope guiding others, I count myself incredibly fortunate. Witnessing the transformation and growth in those I've had the privilege to assist fills me with gratitude. The trust my clients place in me to be part of their healing journey is nothing short of a blessing.

I made a choice to dedicate my career to counseling, specializing in EMDR treatment. Through this profound therapy, I empower my clients to embrace their inner strength and overcome the wounds that hold them back. I believe in the power of every individual to heal, to rise above adversity, and to discover their true potential.

Where were you in life when you decided to start your business?

My private practice journey began during my graduate school days. Amidst a chaotic week filled with my kids' illnesses and sleepless nights, I found myself facing a daunting business plan assignment. Determined to conquer the challenge, I dove into ingenious thinking. Instead of immersing myself in extensive research on me possibly working at addiction centers or eating disorder clinics, I stumbled upon the concept of a private practice – a canvas where I could paint my own unique vision. With fervor, I crafted an exquisite masterpiece detailing my dream practice, envisioning the ideal clientele, and location, and even conjuring up the perfect name. (I really got into this assignment.)

Little did I know that this assignment would become the catalyst for a profound realization. Reflecting on my work of art, I couldn't shake off the thought: "Why not turn this dream into a reality?" The seeds of my own business were planted, and the rest is history. If it weren't for the unexpected illness that caused a slight procrastination, I might not be where I am today. Although, let's just say the professor's B- grade with the critique "Good but needed more research" left me amused at the irony of it all.

What was the biggest sacrifice you’ve had to make when pursuing this career path?

I faced the heart-wrenching decision of sacrificing time with my beautiful sons to pursue my career dreams. As a mother of four boys, I felt a deep sense of responsibility to secure a future filled with independence and self-reliance. That's why I made the brave choice to go back to school, complete my degree, and embark on my own professional journey.

Little did I know the hurdles and hardships that awaited me. Though I had heard about moms going back to school, nobody had prepared me for the true challenges of that road. However, I persevered. I not only flourished academically, graduating with honors, but also grew immensely as an individual. Yet, this achievement came at a cost. During those years of intense dedication, I found myself missing out on precious family moments like movie nights and game nights. My head was buried in books, writing papers, and engaging in discussions with my peers. It was a heartbreaking process, and while physically present, I longed to be fully present mentally with my children. I can still recall putting my kids to bed, only to stay up past midnight to complete my assignments. There were days when my kids relied on crock pot meals, and with the older ones helming the responsibility of caring for their younger siblings, I couldn't help but carry a heavy weight on my heart. However, as I reflected on my journey, I realized that every sacrifice led me closer to the finish line.

With my degree firmly in hand, I made the bold decision to start my own private practice. I knew this new chapter would also require sacrifices, but I couldn't let that deter me. I understood that the path to success is paved with determination and hard work. Alongside continuing to enhance my credentials, I began helping others who were experiencing their own struggles of sacrifice and challenges.

Now, when I speak with my boys about the guilt I sometimes feel for the sacrifices made, their responses warm my heart. While acknowledging the difficulty they faced at times, they shower me with pride and admiration. They understand that their mother, after enduring the greatest hardship of her life, chose to push forward, work tirelessly, and fight for her place in this world.

Knowing what you know now, what would you have done differently when you were first starting out?

Reflecting on my own journey, I realize that commencing my career earlier would have been a game-changer. Although it took a personal traumatic experience to ignite my passion and purpose, I wish I had recognized this path years ago. It's a regret I hold because I now understand the immense fulfillment it brings to help others navigate their pains and struggles. Witnessing someone emerge from the darkness, blossoming into a healed and radiant individual, is an awe-inspiring experience. I consider myself fortunate to be a part of their journey towards healing and restoration.

What does the world need more of? Less of?

In a world teeming with reactivity, the art of reflection has become a rare gem. I will be the first to admit that I was once the fiery, hot-headed individual who always had a quick response ready to fire, regardless of the situation. It seemed like I had something to say after every word uttered my way, which often led to conflicts and misunderstandings.

However, everything changed when I made the decision to return to school and immerse myself in the teachings of mindful communication. The simple act of listening and reflecting on what transpired, rather than reacting immediately, gradually transformed my approach to life. I started spending less time embroiled in arguments and more time proactively addressing situations.

The remarkable shift I experienced did not go unnoticed. Not only did I find myself ruffling fewer feathers through this newfound practice, but I also discovered a profound sense of happiness and contentment—qualities I observed in those who embraced the wisdom of listening and reflection.

Don't misunderstand me; there are still certain subjects that ignite my passion. However, for the most part, I now strive to sit with my thoughts, to cradle them gently, and to think things through before responding. This intentional pause allows me to respond with greater clarity, empathy, and understanding.

What’s the first thing you do every morning to start your day off on the right foot?

Each morning, before I dive into my day, I make sure to carve out a little piece of serenity for myself through meditation. It's like a secret meeting with my thoughts and emotions, where I get to prepare mentally and emotionally for the journey ahead.

In this precious time of reflection, gratitude takes center stage. I make it a point to count my blessings and express sincere appreciation for the incredible moments and opportunities life has given me. It's a humbling experience that ignites a deep sense of purpose as a therapist. It reminds me of the immense impact I can have on individuals' lives, and it fuels my genuine compassion and empathy. That way, when I encounter each person who walks through my door, I can create a therapeutic space where genuine healing and growth can take place.

But meditation is not just about gratitude for me; it's also a way to seek wisdom and understanding. Life loves to throw curveballs and present us with tricky situations, both personally and professionally. In those quiet moments of introspection, I humbly ask for clarity and insight to navigate those challenges. By surrendering to the process and trusting in the inner well of knowledge and guidance, I empower myself to make sound decisions and provide valuable support to those who rely on me.

I can't stress enough how crucial meditation is to my self-care routine as a therapist. It's my way of making sure that I'm mentally and emotionally aligned before offering my knowledge and expertise to others. Through the practice of gratitude and the constant pursuit of wisdom, I'm constantly reaffirming my commitment to personal growth and professional excellence. It's a journey that keeps me dedicated and ready to provide the highest level of care to each and every one of my clients.

Andrea Kirby, MA, LPCC, NCC is a Mental Health Counselor and founder of Creative Beginnings Counseling in Westminster, CO.

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